If You Build It… by Dwier Brown
…A book about fathers, fate, and Field of Dreams
Well of course I loved it. The movie, I mean. And of course I cried. Like most American men, hell, most anyone male or female anywhere, I always find a reason, maybe many reasons, to just break down at that final scene.
But there’s something extra for me.
When John Kinsella – played by Dwier Brown, in a 5-minute scene that transcends all the rest of his 35-year acting career put together – stands up from his crouch to turn and look at Kevin Costner’s Ray, well, that’s where it hits the deepest.
The dude actually looks like my dad.
Not everyone sees it. But that angular face, the set of the nose and mouth, the wonder in his eyes, they all bring back pictures of my father when he was a young man. Dad never got “worn down by life” like Ray Kinsella’s father. Or, if he did, he never took it out on me. But still…
So I’m already drenched in tears before John meets his granddaughter, way before John and Ray talk of heaven, and Iowa, and by the time they get down to the magic seven words that sweep away Ray’s guilt… well, “hey… Dad… ya wanna have a catch?” just destroys me, with the enormity of it all.
Dwier Brown is a solid, hardworking actor. Just check out his IMDb page. But do people buttonhole him at restaurants because he was Tyler’s foster father on that one episode of Charmed? Do they break down in tears over his Captain Brewer in Gettysburg? Of course not. The sobs come, the regrets and loss and grief spill forth, over five minutes that brought a film together and brought so much raw emotion out of our hearts when we saw it.
It’s a scene that’s more felt than viewed. Deep down. And when a man tells Dwier Brown what it meant to him – what it felt like – it’s like Dwier Brown doesn’t exist and the man’s talking to John Kinsella himself.
Brown doesn’t mind. In fact he knows he’s lucky to have those five minutes on his resume. Countless people have shared their own stories with him. Which is why he wrote the book.
If You Build It circles between the movie set, encounters with fans, and stories of Brown’s childhood and his own father, who died just months before Field of Dreams was filmed. We go behind the scenes for the stresses and thrills of moviemaking. Then we’re in a hot tub with a sasquatch of a man, wondering how to comfort him through his tears. And we’re brought back to growing up as the son of Walter W. Brown, an energetic if silent and stoic father.
It’s a cool way to write a book. It’s wrenching in its own sense, in the real-life tales from outside the big screen. But Brown has a graceful catch with his readers who keep throwing the ball back, giving, getting, giving, getting, far into the Iowa twilight.
And yeah. I cried again.
